Ten Things Learned After Ten Years of Singing
Ten Things Learned After Ten Years of Singing
October 16, 2015
I would have done anything to get out of it by the time it was my turn to sing a verse from “Here I Am To Worship”.
It feels like it was just weeks ago — not ten years — that I nervously wrote my name on a sign-up list to try out as a singer at IHOPKC. Truth be told, I was actually signing up to try out on keys but thought I’d throw singing in there too, just in case I could do both. The judge panel included IHOPKC’s head worship leaders and voice instructor. And I was shaking in my flip flops.
To my surprise, I did not pass the audition as a keyboard player, but I did pass as a singer. The opposite of what I expected. And so I knew my first order of business was to start taking voice lessons. I was in over my head, and I could use all the help I could get.
That was ten years ago! In many ways I still feel like that girl who just barely passed try-outs, trying to figure out what the heck I’m doing masquerading as a singer. In other ways I feel old. Like, 32 years old.
When I joined my first worship team back in 2005, I remember there was a singer who was 29 and had kids. I remember thinking, “wow, it’s amazing she can still do that at this point in life.” And now here we are, a minute later, and it’s me who is the mom of two, doing what I can to make it into the prayer room.
As I look back on 10 years as a singer and worship leader in the house of prayer, I thought it’d be fun to put together a list of 10 things I have learned.
1. You sound best when you sound like the best you
God was being intentional when He made your unique sound. No accidents, no clones. No one sounds quite like YOU. You’re short-changing Him and the church you’re trying to serve if you’re constantly trying to become another singer. That said, be the best sounding you possible. Reach for excellence in every way. Never ever stop growing. Lessons are a must. How do you learn, glean from and emulate other singers and styles while still offering your unique sound? No one can answer that for you, but it’s a personal journey worth taking.
2. Sing with people you admire and emulate them
In order to train oxen, ranchers will yoke the neck a weaker animal with a stronger, more experienced one. The weaker ox is forced to make some changes in order to keep up. It’s the fastest way to learn. What do you look up to in the singers around you? Is one strong in the Word? One sings really confidently in front of a congregation? Watch them. Ask questions. Take aspects of what they do and try it on for size. Tell them you’re doing it, too, and you’ll likely have a new friend in your corner, teaching you and rooting for you as you grow.
3. When being a singer feels hard and doors seem to be closing, it is not time for a season change
Seeming failure and hardship is not usually a “hint hint” from the Lord that your season is over. Rather, it’s those difficulties that may prove the most fruitful moments of your life if you press through to the other side. It’s in the hidden shadows of demotion that the Lord often meets us most dramatically. Underneath the sting of demotion is an invitation to communion with the Lord. He removes the peripherals in order to speak straight to our hearts. Oftentimes those quiet, lonely seasons are where He gives us the message we will later sing from the rooftops.
4. If you want to get on a certain worship team, marry someone on that worship team
Don’t ask me how I know this. But trust me, it works. And you just might end up with the most brilliant, tender, attractive spouse on the planet.
5. Just smile, say thank you, and shut your mouth
What is it about getting a compliment that makes us want to spill our guts about what a horrible job we actually did and all the mistakes we made and how embarrassed we are? Actually, I do know what it is. Pride. So let’s lay that thing down and take a compliment! Smile. Thank you. Swallow the disclaimers. Tastes a lot like humble pie, and we can often use another helping of that.
6. Never stop improving
We have a million reasons to not reach for excellence, and they’re all bad ones. If you’re called to be a singer, you’re called to be a learner. By far the most fruitful way to learn is private voice lessons. There are also many resources, videos, books that help free us up to singing in new levels of excellence. It looks different in every season, but don’t back down. Improving is not so we sound more impressive. It’s so we can more accurately and freely paint the picture the Lord is expressing through us. It’s like an artist getting new shades of color added to his palette. Spend the money, take the time, do what it takes. Overcoming vocal limitations, even in small ways, is absolutely exhilarating.
7. If someone tells you ways you need to improve, buy them a coffee
They just did you a massive favor. I remember when I was a new singer. One of the strongest singers at IHOPKC stopped me in the hallway and gave me a tip on how I could sound better. You know what it made me feel like? A million bucks. There’s no way she would have taken the time to tell me that unless she saw the potential in me to actually improve. And she cared enough about me to share it. This doesn’t mean you should be wide open to any criticism. Some things need to just roll off your back without another thought. Just be teachable. Have ears to hear, and be grateful for the help! We all need it.
8. If you don’t feel free to fail, you’ll never be free to fly
Cliché, but so true. If you are waiting to step out till you are sure you will deliver and be well received, you will forever be silent. I have sung so many (SO MANY) things that didn’t go off like I had hoped. But even if I could go back in time and undo those moments, I wouldn’t. Just stepping out and singing something is better than nothing many times. You have to keep up the inertia of singing boldly. There’s a momentum factor, and when you lose it, it’s hard to get back in the game. So SING.
9. Get out of your bubble and listen
This is especially true while you are singing with a worship team. Some of the most beautiful phrases, melodies and songs come when we pull from what we hear another team member doing. Steal a melody from the guitar player for your chorus. Do a counter rhythm that plays off what the drummer is doing. We go further when we go together as a worship team. This also applies when you’re listening to music on your own. Broaden the range of what you listen to. Hearing different musical styles will enhance what you have to offer as a singer.
10. Comparison is the thief of joy
Yup, a Teddy Roosevelt quote. And it’s so true. We are vessels; pieces of artwork formed by a Potter. There is purpose in your mix of strengths and weaknesses. God was being intentional when He made you. Who you are tells a story. He’s the Author, and every detail points to His glory. When we measure ourselves up against one another we tragically miss the point. It’s not about who’s more this or that; it’s about being YOU at 100% capacity. What pleasure He receives from us when we, with thankful hearts, display what He’s made. Don’t deny Him glory from your story by getting tripped up with what He’s saying through the journey of another.
Thinking back at what I’ve learned these past 10 years, I think I just talked myself into the next 10…
Are you a singer, worship leader, or musician? What are the challenges, successes, and failures you’re facing right now?
About the author
